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FUCK THE UNITED STATES




{{Infobox
|Box title = The Third Wheel
|image = [[FIle:200px-The Third Wheel Cover.jpg|250px]]
|caption = "Love is in the air, but what does that mean for Greg Heffley?"
|Row 1 title = Author/Illustrator/Cover Artist
|Row 1 info = Jeff Kinney
|Row 2 title = Publisher
|Row 2 info = Amulet Books
|Row 3 title = Release Date
|Row 3 info = November 13th, 2012
|Row 4 title = Pages
|Row 4 info = 217  (235 including activity pages)
|Row 5 title = Preceded by
|Row 5 info = ''[[Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Cabin Fever|Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Cabin Fever]]''
|Row 6 title = Followed by
|Row 6 info = [[Diary of a Wimpy Kid 8]]
|Row 7 title = Color
|Row 7 info = Brown}}
'''''Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Third Wheel''''' is the 7th book of the ''Diary of a Wimpy Kid'' series. The book's sneak peek was released on October 2012, then the book officially released on November 13, 2012. Uncle Gary was the main antagonist, this one of the only books to based on a specific event, its main event is the Valentine's Dance in the gym. Jeff Kinney also announced that a eighth book is also coming.
==Characters==
===Main and Major===
*[[Frank Heffley]]
*[[Rodrick Heffley]]
*[[Greg Heffley]](Main Character)
*[[Rowley Jefferson]]
*[[Gary Heffley]](Main Antagonist)
*[[Manny Heffley]]
*[[Susan Heffley]]
*[[Abigail Brown]]
*[[Eugene Ellis]]
==Plot==
{{Template:Spoiler}}
===January===
Greg says how he wished of having a journal earlier because the person who is going to write his biography will have a lot of questions of his life till middle school, but luckily for Greg he remembers them all and also remembers about things that happened before he was born. He was in a dark place doing blackflips and taking naps then his mother would put parental speakers and turn classical music thinking it would make Greg a genius whenever he is born,she would tell Greg about her day and would make Frank tell him about his day at work too.Greg thens tells how he would hear anything his mom said even if the speakers weren't there and how he would get angry when his parents get affectionate,he would kick everytime his parents kissed,his parents found it intresting and kissed again to hear his kick again. Then Greg wanted to get of there so he got out three-weeks early but he was in a lousy mood and wanted to go back in.Then a few days later after his birth he met his brother,Rodrick,he used to think he is the only child untill he met Rodricfgbrmfnk which disappointed him,his family lived in a small apartment so Rodrick had to sleep on the crib while Greg inside the dresser drawer,after his father moved Greg got the crib and Rodrick a bed.Then Greg talks about how everything he had used to be hand-me down from Rodrick in those days.When Susan announced that she is having another baby,Greg went and started telling Manny not to touch his things through the parental speakers.When his brother was born he had a black stub,eventually when Manny's stub dried,nobody had seen it dry so Greg is scared its going to come up sometime soon.Then Greg talks about how his mother would make him watch educational videos and how he would change it to something he liked and removed the battries from the remote and hide them in his crib.Greg complains about how Susan didn't let him crawl around the floor much when he was little because that resulted in him being behind the other kids in his playgroup in physical things.Then Susan brought a baby walker called "Baby Adventures Action Walker",Greg loved it as it had music coming out of it,had little toys sticking on it and also had a cup holder,this made other kids jealous.But Susan read in a parenting magazine that Action walkers are not good for babies as they don't make babies devlop the bones to walk,so she returned it.Greg learned to walk,but by the time he was in pre-school,the kids could use zips and buttons while Greg needed help from a grown-up and they could also do many other things Greg couldn't do,so Greg started feeding them bad information to slow them down,but his teacher thought he isn't learning anything so she called Susan,Susan made Greg skip a grade.In kindergarten,kids could do things like cut with scissors and colour inside lines,Greg got scared and hid under the table,Susan made Greg go back to Pre-school.Greg then talks about a show called The Snurples which Manny likes to watch and has its own langauge and how Manny learned the language and uses it to talk with the others.Greg then talks about how Manny has no friends and how he is scared of other children and how he came up with imaginary friends called Joey,Petey,Danny,Charles Tribble,Tiny Jim and Johnny Cheddar and how he uses them to get out of trouble and get extra dessert and how Susan doesn't tells him that they are fake because she thinks Manny will get traumatized.Greg then talks about a family-style resturant called "Corny's" where the family goes in family time,they have a rule of not wearing tie and they did cut Frank's when he first came there.Greg complains how they always get put in Kids section because they have Manny around and how the the kid section is a madhouse and how the tables and floor are filled with half-eaten food on them and also complains about their service and seatings and ice-cream dispenser.Greg was doing his household chores,just then he heard a knock and found his uncle Gary there,who had bought shirts from a person from Boston to sell them and get money,but they had a typo that said Botson and nobody would buy them,so he had to stay with Frank.Living with Gary has been bad for the Heffley's because his nightmares made Manny keep his bed away from wall,whenever Rodrick got kicked out of bed at morning he would have trouble and have to sleep on the upper part of couch.Then Greg also talks about how Gary's been trying different jobs but is quiting them and how Frank wants him to get a job and Greg also complains about how Gary used up all his bubble bath and uses his money on buying scratch cards.Greg then talks about the ball-room dancing unit and about a girl called Ruby Bird which is the only girl to ever be suspended from his school and has a habit of biting people and how Greg doesn't wants to get paired up with her.It was the partner selection day,Ruby got selected with Fregley while Greg and four other guys didn't got selected and how the teacher made the boys dance with each other.A hyptonist called Amazing Andrew came to the school in a special assembly and made a line of kids think there arms are linked together and they would unlink if he said "Cucumber!" and then he talks about the previous assembly guests like Strong Steve and Kristinna and talks about how a police officer came and told them about narc and how after that Greg and Rowley formed a detective agency.Greg then talks about how Vice-Principal Roy came and announced to everyone that the student council is getting replaced because the previous one weren't attending the meeting,Greg seemed excited but he also made a rule that people with three or more detentions are not allowed,this was bad for Greg as he caught his third detention,but then Greg realized he could get Rowley to become a student council member and how Greg would guide him.Rowley chose to be a Social Chairperson.It was the speech day,Greg took some shirts from his garage and wrote a letter on each one which in all spelled "VOTE ROWLEY JEFFERSON FOR SOCIAL CHAIRPERSON",but he found only presidents were giving speech and Rowley became the social chairperson as he was the only one running for it.A kid called Eugene Ellis made a speech that he would replace all the cheap toilet paper with expensive quilted ones,all kids realized toilet paper problems and elected him.On the first student council meeting,the teacher Mrs Birch told Eugene its to expensive to stack all the toilets with expensive toilet paper and said the kids are allowed to bring their own.Greg talks about how Gary has been trying to take loans from Greg just to buy scratch cards.
===February===
It was the first day to bring toilet papers,some kids had brought to much and they had to carry it around.The teachers made a rule to have only five papers at a time,Greg had twenty and wanted them to run throughout the year,so he picked a stall in the bathroom and slipped some old shoes and all his toilet paper inside and would only use that spot,but one day he pick up a spare shoe and the kids found he is using quality paper and stole his papers.Then the student councils started making up fundraiser ideas,Eugene assigned the duty to the vice-president,Hillary Pine,she came up with a Valentine's Day dance idea,but Eugene and the treasurer Javan wanted to change it but the teacher told them they had to respect their decision.Everybody started getting excited about the dance,some boys made up that they aren't going to come because they don't want to waste money for a dance,but it all changed after the first Candy Gram wave was delivered,they became jealous and rushed to the stall in the recess.And then Greg talks how the boys are trying to be in their best behaviour when the girls aren't around.Then he talks about how the pantsing incidents started when a kid called Anthony Renfrew pantsed Daniel Revis when Daniel was shooting free throws in the basketball unit in phys ed.After that all kids got scared that they are going to get pantsed so they didn't even walk and started scooting on the floor,Mr Roy got angry and gave boys a lecture that whoever pantse someone will get suspended,but right then the pantser pantsed Mr Roy and ran away,the kids started calling him the "Mad Pantser".Then Greg tells about almost all the boys in his homeroom are getting Candy Grams and he is nervous he might not get one,so he asked Gary for advice,Gary told him to buy many grams and send them to himself to make sure the girls think he is a hot propety.Greg used his two dollars lunch money to buy the grams and send them all to himself.Since the last few days Greg used up five dollars,he thought of writing a candy gram to a actual girl,he wrote one to Adrianne Simpson,he even wrote a small note saying "If the answer is no pass it to Julia Barros" to make it sure he doesn't waste his quarter on only one girl.But they both rejected him,Greg thought of writing a note and push it into Leighann Marlow's seat,but somebody in the after-school detention scribbled on it,but Leighann did read it but she also rejected Greg.Greg then talks about how he is nervous and he even made up a realtionship chart to see who is dating who,Greg's worried about Evan Whitehead,a boy who bragged that he has kissed many girls in Greg's grade.Greg thought of getting Peyton Ellis but she ignored Greg when Greg came near her when she was drinking from the water fountain,then Greg thinks of getting Bethany Breen,his lab partner,but Greg thought the frogs thing will stay in his mind so he skipped her.Gary told Greg to get a wingman,Greg made Rowley his wingman,but however Rowley was telling fibs about Greg to the girls.Greg went to his room and thought of calling Alyssa Grove who broke up with her boyfriend,but she wasn't home so he started recording messages,but Rowley was in his room and making funny faces,causing Greg to laugh and ruin his messages,they soon started goofing with the phone and recorded twenty messages.Alyssa's father came and complained to Frank,so Greg rubbed Alyssa from his list.Gary told Greg to find something new,but Susan won't let Greg buy new clothes,so he started poking around but he couldn't find anything good for him in Rodrick's wardrobe,Gary told Greg to check Frank's and he found a black-leather jacket and his father let him borrow it but Susan said he will lose it or damage it.After taking shower,Gregory sneaked out wearing the jacket without Susan seeing him,Greg found aviator sunglasses in one and a picture of his parents kissing in the other which disgusted him.Greg got much attention and everyone was looking at him,but just then his mother came and took his jacket and gave Greg her winter coat to wear.The whole thing about Greg has been spread throughout the school so he was looking for a girl from church to go with him,Greg's mother became friends with Mrs Stringer who has two children,a girl of Greg's age,Laurel and Boy around Manny's age called Wesley Stringer.Susan had invited them over for dinner,Greg thought he would impress Laurel and would go with her to the dance.By the time the Stringers came,Wesley Stringer turned out to be the kid that scared Manny by telling him he was a vampire.Susan made mushroom chicken with asparagus,Greg hated it but he didn't wanted to look wierd infront of Laurel Stringer so he choked it.Laurel tells Susan about how they can't find a relaible baby-sitter for Wesley,Greg volunteered and Mrs Stringer seemed impressed.Greg was dropped at the Stringer's house at 6:30 PM,Laurel had already gone this was bad for Greg as he thought of talking to her about the dance.When the Stringers left,Wesley told Greg to get his bike out of the garage,but Greg said he would ruin the floor,Wesley threw a Tantrum but he calmed down and told Greg to get his colouring gear from the laundy room,but when Greg went there Wesley locked the door,about a half hour later Greg moved the spare freezer and found a door behind it,Greg went through the door and got out of the house,Greg found a open window and landed on Laurel's room,it was cold outside so Greg slept there but by the time The Stringers already came and presumably fired him.After blowing his chances with Laurel,Greg couldn't find any partner,but right then Rowley said that Abigail Brown complained to the Dance Comittee that her boyfriend Michael Sampson has family obligations,Greg and Rowley went to her and asked if she would go with them as a dance group,she seemed happy about it.After Greg told Gary about it,Gary became excited and told Greg to wear a suit to impress his date and volunteered to be a DJ for the dance.Greg found a suit he liked in Rodrick's wardrobe,Greg didn't find any cologne in Rodrick's junk drawer but found a body spray,Greg thought it was safer to use his Great Uncle Bruce's cologne,Greg made Frank go to the grocery store and bought chocolates for Abigiail.Greg went to Rowley's house and founnd two little bumps on Rowley's face and thought they were chicken pox,Greg took Mrs Jefferson's makeup and covered the chicken pox with it and made Rowley wear socks on his hands and he gave Rowley a scarf to wear to hide his makeup and made Rowley wear a beach hat to hide his chicken pox on the forehead,then they went to the car and then they stopped at Abigail's house and Greg went and got her outside,but Abigail was wearing a poofy dress and the passenger seat had pile of papers so Greg had to ride on the back.Abigail thought Rowley was sitting on a booster seat as a joke.Mr Jefferson stopped to get his vaccum cleaner,when they stopped to go to Spriggo's Greg found that his suit jacket got dirtied from the vaccum cleaner so Greg left it in the car,but the host said that the gentlemen and had to wear a jacket,he gave Greg a subsitute one but it stunk,Greg went to the bathroom to clean it but he couldn't so he left the place and was forced to go to Corny's.At Corny's Greg rolled his tie into his pocket but forgot to warn Rowley so the person there snipped his tie off and put it on the wall of shame.Since they didn't had any little kids with them,they got seated in adult's alley,there Abigial and Rowley ordered two appetizers,after they ate them Abigail ordered the most expensive item,T-Bone Steak,Rowley ordered the same.After Abby and Rowley ate there steaks they picked a dessert,to save money Greg fibbed to the waiteress that its Rowley's birthday so she gave him a free cake.After that the bill was to much for Greg,so he took out his emergency money from his socks but it was wet so he drawed five dollars from Mr Jefferson.When they got to the school,Greg seemed pretty impressed about how they had a long table set up with punch and snacks and chocolate fountain with strawberries for dipping,after giving there tickets they went to get pictures at a backdrop of paris as the dance's theme was "Midnight at Paris" but Rowley also came ruining the photo for Greg.Greg found that Gary was selling the boston shirts and due to the room being dark the kids didn't find about that.At 7:50 when the music started some senior  centre members started coming,then by 10 minutes there were many of them,the teacher said the booked the gym two weeks ago,but the seniors had booked it two months ago and had paperwork for proof,after that they got into a fight.But then one of the teachers,Mrs Sheer said that that the kids can dance on on e side while the seniors on other,the fight soon broke up and partition was put up,the seniors turned the lights on,the kids who bought the shirts knew they are ripped of but Gary distracted them by turning the music up.Just then the seniors complained and made Gary turn the music off,Gary turned it low by about 80% and the kids could hear every speech the seniors said,the girls didn't seem bothered as they took out personal-music players.Just then the boys got fed up of being in the best behaviour so they started playing around with the food and their clothings.Greg was going to the seats but the mad pantser pantsed Rowley there so he stayed there,just then Michael Sampson came with Cherie Bellanger,but Michael saw Abigail and Abigail started crying and Greg and her friends cheered her up.Just then the senior meeting ended and the seniors ate all the refreshments,the kids started sticking figers directly into the fountain,but Mrs Sheer had to shut it down as a kid lost his contact lense.Just then the seniors also started dancing,some seniors started getting attracted to Greg.Just then Gary announced the last song is coming,so many kids paired up,Greg was in a corner waiting for it to end,just then he saw Ruby Bird coming to him,so he grabbed Abigail's hand and went to the dance floor.But Greg saw a few pimples on Abigail's face and mistakened it for chicken pox and screamed out loud,but found it was just pimples and he dance ended.Abigial wasn't talking to Rowley and was close to Rowley and was talking only to him.After the dance,one of Gary's scratch cards won him forty-thousand-dollar,he repayed Frank the money he owed him and wished Greg luck in his love life and moved out.Greg also got chickenpox,Greg found out that Rowley's chicken pox were just pimples and also heard that Rowley and Abigial became couples,with Chicken-pox Greg could take long baths when everyone is out of the house,Greg starts believing that Johnny Cheddar has stolen towel when it wents missing.
==Flashbacks==
These are the flashbacks shown throughout the book,these are arranged in the order they were shown.
{{Template:Spoiler}}
*The first time Greg went to Corny's he didn't look at his seat and ended up sitting on a open faced peanut butter jelly sandwich.
*Susan once took Manny to the ball-pit,Manny went into the plastic tubes and was too scared to come down on his own,so Susan made Greg go their,when Greg got to the top of the tubes,there wasn't any ventilation there so Greg's socks become dirty,a kid vommitted and all the kids ran away,Greg found Manny but Greg also got scared and a waiter came to save both of them and this caused Greg to throw away his favourite jeans because even after washing them with bleach three times,they weren't cleaning.
*(this was shown in the middle of the flashback when Manny gets stuck in plastic-tubes)Greg tells about how he is bad at mazes and how he and Susan went to the Corn maze in Reynold's farm a autumn ago,they got stuck their,Greg couldn't help them escape so Susan called somebody from 911 to rescue them.
*Greg says about how on a new year's eve Susan wanted Manny to feel what its like staying up at midnight without letting him stay late so Susan turned all the clocks three hours ahead ,Susan and Frank started counting with Manny,Greg thought it was midnight for real and he joined them,Greg slept at 10:30 thinking it was 1:30,this caused Greg's time shedule of the year messed up by three hours.
*Gary had once taking a job as a test-subject for a company which made pepper spray,he got fed up of the job and quit before lunch time.
*A summer ago,Greg's father had a "Bring your child to work day",all the kids went to the cafeteria and there the grown-ups had things to entertain the kids,later Frank took Greg to his office,Frank was getting disturbed by Greg,so he gave Greg a dollar,Greg bought some jawbreakers and Frank got more disturbed so he made Greg go out,Greg went to the bathroom and stayed almost the whole night until a janitor found him.
*Greg talks about how about a year ago he wrote the name of the girl he liked the most named Baylee Anthony,Baylee wrote Bryce Anderson's name,but Bryce got paired up with McKenzie Pollard,Greg got selected with Baylee because he picked her,but Baylee kept complaining and Greg couldn't dance.
*A assembly guest called Strong Steve came to the school a year ago,he gave kids a lecture about how they needed to stay off drugs and ripped a phone books as his finale.The kids got crazy after him and tore half of the refference books in the library.
*They also once had a guest called Krisstina who claimed to be a international pop singer and her lyrics were about telling kids too never give-up and follow their dreams,however her world tour tells she has never been out of the state.
*A police officer also one came and told the kids about narc which was about pretending to be a highschool student and report on teens that were doing bad things.
*On Greg's first day of middle school,a eighth grader came and told Greg about a secret elevator that goes to the second floor and sold a pass to him for five bucks,it turned out to be the janitor's room,Greg held the pass until he sold it to someother six-grader.
*A few weeks ago Greg's school had a fundraiser were they sold crunchy chocolate candy-bars,Greg ate about fifteen,until Susan found it out and stopped him,she also wrote a cheque and sent it to the school for money to make up for the candy-bars.
*Some years ago,Frank bought Gary a winter jacket,while Gary bought him a scratch card which only costed a dollar,Frank was angry,but when he scratched,he got three cherries which were the prize for a hundred-thousand dollar,Frank got excited but found it was a fake gag gift.
*When Susan was in PTA,she started a petition about making kids wear school-uniforms because she read it makes kid do better in academics,she didn't got much signatures,but it got spread that she was the one who started it,some kids got angry and wanted to beat Greg up afters school,,making Greg a half-hour until it gets safe outside.
*Greg talks about how Rodrick used to give time-outs to Greg even though he wasn't authorized to give him,Greg once broke the wedding photo,Rodrick gave him a half-hour timeout,when Greg's parents came Greg said that they didn't need to give him a time-out because Rodrick already gave him,but they told him only the can give him time-outs and gave him a double time-out.
===<span style="font-size:18px;">Excerpts</span>===
*''I looked for a way to escape, but I was trapped. Luckily, Abigail walked out of the bathroom at that exact moment and I grabbed her hand just before Ruby got to me. Abigail's makeup was a mess from all of the crying, but I didn't really care. I was just happy to have an excuse to get  away from Ruby. And to be honest with you, I think Abigail was happy to see me, too, so I led her to an empty spot on the dance floor.''
*''I'd never slow-danced with a girl before, So I didn't know where I was supposed to put my hands. She put hers on my shoulder, and I put mine in my pockets, but that kind of felt dumb. So we met in the middle, and that seemed about right.''
*''And speaking of Rowley and Abigail, I heard that the two of them are a couple now. All I can say is if that's true, it makes Rowley 'the worst wingman in history.'''
*''Im supposed to stay home from school for at least a week. The good news is that with everyone out of the house, I can take a long bath without anyone bothering me.''
*''Or at least I THINK I'm alone. Today I had a fresh towel next to the tub, and when I open my eyes it was gone. So either somebody's messing with me or Johnny Chedder is at it again.''
*''Everything probably would've been just fine, but at lunch someone threw a roll of toilet paper at somebody else, and within about fifteen seconds it was a total madhouse.''
*''I couldn't find any cologne in Rodrick's junk drawer, but I DID find a bottle of that body spray they're always advertising on TV. I was a little nervous about using it, though, because if that stuff really works like they say in the ads then tomorrow night could be a nightmare.''
*''I just watched everything play out from my spot against the back wall,wondering why I'd wanted to go to the dance in the first place. I was also to regret not wearing body spray in Rodrick's junk drawer, because Great Uncle Bruce's colonge was attracting people outside my age group.''
==''Gallery''==
''<gallery columns="dynamic" spacing="medium" widths="208">
''<gallery columns="dynamic" spacing="medium" widths="208">
Seniors.PNG|Seniors Overrun the dance
Seniors.PNG|Seniors Overrun the dance
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Cover up.PNG|Greg and Rodrick cover Gary with a sheet when Stringers are coming for dinner.
Cover up.PNG|Greg and Rodrick cover Gary with a sheet when Stringers are coming for dinner.
</gallery>''
</gallery>''
==Major Events==
*Greg talks about when he was a baby.
*Uncle Gary moves in with the Heffleys.
*Rowley becomes the Social Chairperson.
*[[Eugene Ellis]] becomes the President of Student Council.
*[[Javan Hill]] becomes the Treasurer.
*[[Hillary Pine]] becomes the Vice President. 
*[[Olivia Davis]] becomes the Secretary.
*The formation of the Dance Committee
*Greg tries to get a date for the Valentine's Dance.
*Greg goes to the Valentine's Dance with Abigail and Rowley as a group of friends.
*Uncle Gary wins $40,000 and moves out.
*Greg gets chicken pox in the end.
*Greg heard a rumour that Rowley and Abigail became a couple.
==Trivia==
*Holly Hills was rumoured to be Greg's partner for the dance by many fans, but she wasn't even mentioned and only appeared in Greg's relationship chart as liking Bryce Anderson. This could mean Greg has given up on Holly. At the end of The Last Straw it was hinted after Greg wrote the fake letter from Holly Hills that he gave up on her due to being too hard to reach.
**However, in the Movie Dog Days, Holly did became couple with Greg; in the book they didn't become couples which might explain why Holly picked Bryce Anderson.
*This book has the joint least-months along with Cabin Fever as they both have only two months.
*It is unknown who the [[Mad Pantser]] is.
*There is an exclusive version of this book, which has Fregley's secret note in the back. It's a poem by Fregley that shows why girls (specifically Ruby Bird) must go with him to the dance.
*Jeff Kinney announced that Diary of a Wimpy Kid 8 is coming.
*Rodrick is shown much skinner then he is in other books.
*Rowley closes his mouth for the first time in the whole series on page 166 while eating chocolate.
*It was revealed that Rodrick might hate Greg because Susan gave Rodrick's pacifier to Greg and Rodrick never wanted to give his pacifier up, but this might not be true because Rodrick doesn't act childish.
*It is unknown what happened to Greg's towel at the end of the story, it might be revealed in eighth book.
*Rodrick has a much shorter role in this book,in most of the parts when the family gathers together Rodrick is not there.
**Also, Rodrick doesn't bother Greg, making it the first book to not have Rodrick bully Greg.
*Greg claims to remember stuff before he was born. However, doing so is biologically impossible. He is most likely writing what he thinks happened. 
*Greg has his covers yanked off the bed by his father to wake Greg up for school. This is the second time this has happened in the series. The first was The Last Straw.
*Greg weighed only 5 pounds and 7 ounces at birth - the average is 7 ounces and 8 pounds, meaning he was two pounds lighter than average,this hints why he was so thin and another hint is that he was born 3 weeks premature
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Revision as of 20:57, 24 March 2013

FUCK THE UNITED STATES